Borderlands 2: Marcus Quotes

Marcus
So, you want to hear another story, eh? One where the very fate of Pandora hangs in the balance? If not, too bad -- I’m telling you anyway. <Ep1 - Pt1>
First, there was the Vault -- an alien prison opened with a mystical key. To the warriors who opened it, the vault was just a container of tentacles and disappointment. They vanished into the wastelands, certain that the Vault held no treasure at all. <Ep1 - Pt1>
They were wrong. <Ep1 - Pt1>
The vault’s opening triggered the growth of Eridium, a priceless alien element. Soon, the rare and valuable mineral emerged all across Pandora. Its appearance attracted many. Including...the Hyperion corporation. <Ep1 - Pt1>
They came to Pandora to mine Eridium, and bring order to the savage planet. Through their excavations, Hyperion uncovered evidence of an even greater vault. Their leader vowed to find it -- to use its power to civilize the Borderlands, once and for all. <Ep1 - Pt1>
But Hyperion weren’t the only ones searching for the next Vault’s alien power. The call of danger and loot is not so easily resisted. Certain warriors came to Pandora in droves to uncover its hidden secrets. Some would call them adventurers. Others call them fools. But I...call them vault hunters. <Ep1 - Pt1>
Our story begins with them, and with a man named Handsome Jack... <Ep1 - Pt1>
This is Marcus of Marcus Munitions -- be sure to check out my storefront in Sanctuary! <Ep2 - pt4>
Hmm, I dunno… <Ep4 - Pt2>
Looks like it works to me. <Ep4 - Pt2>
I know you're busy, but you must be careful -- do NOT shoot those statues of me. They are awesome, and I have dibs on them. <Ep6 - Pt2>
What, the Vault Key? Then maybe you shouldn’t have sold it to Tannis! If you’d given it to your old pal Marcus, maybe we wouldn’t be in this situation! <Ep7 - Pt1>
The hell are you doing in here? Get out there and do something! <Ep8 - Pt4>
What the -- how the hell'd you get back there? (sighing) Frigging Vault Hunters. <Ep13 - Pt4>
Son of a bitch -- robbed me blind! <Ep13 - Pt4>
Jack’s monopoly on weapons is running me out of business. But that’s not why I want him dead. I want him dead because he’s a greedy, murdering sonofabitch who needs to die screaming. Good luck. <Ep17 - Pt6>
Here -- you might need this. <Ep17 - Pt6>
Roland's…dead? …Oh. Me and him didn't see eye to eye most of the time -- he never liked how I sold guns to the bandits -- but I would have died in New Haven if it weren't for him. He was a…he was a good man. <BearBadNews>
If you're going after Jack, this might be of use. <BearBadNews>
I was making change for some idiot named Kai few weeks back, and gave him a ten instead of a one. I need you to track him down and get the nine bucks he owes me. He was mumbling into an ECHO device when he came in -- maybe you can track him by finding his transmissions. <ChosenOne>
(in the distance, faux-awestruck) It is you! <ChosenOne>
No, no no -- it is YOU! The chosen one! <ChosenOne>
Quickly, into my store! We haven't a moment to lose! <ChosenOne>
The prophecies spoke of a man who would come to Sanctuary, forever speaking into an ECHO recorder. He would be a humble man, of unknown origins -- <ChosenOne>
(backpedalling) A very famous man, beloved the galaxy over! He would wield the... Evil...Smasher forged by my own hand, and save our galaxy forever! <ChosenOne>
It is your calling! You MUST purchase the Evil Smasher from me and save our planet! You'll be rewarded with riches, fame! Moxxi's hand in marri-- <ChosenOne>
(suddenly pragmatic and disinterested) Two million dollars. <ChosenOne>
Pahaha. What a jackass. Now gimme my money back. <ChosenOne>
"Chosen one." Pah! <ChosenOne>
Hahahahahahahahahaha! No. <ClaptrapBirthday>
So, last night I got a little tipsy and I was thinking about all the unsatisfied customers I've had, so I mailed out some...refunds. I don't know what I was thinking -- you have to get those checks back from the mailboxes before the auto-post sends them off. You gotta hurry, they'll be sent any minute! <CustomerService>
One minute left! <CustomerService>
Thirty seconds! <CustomerService>
Ten seconds! Hurry! <CustomerService>
You took too long -- that's money I'll never get back! <CustomerService>
I knew you'd make me proud! Come on back. <CustomerService>
Refunds...my god. I'm never drinking rakk-ale again. <CustomerService>
Oof -- skags ate a gun? No way to tell which one of the ugly things has it -- just start hunting skags and hope for the best! <HungryLikeSkag>
Hey, you found all the gun parts! Bring them back here and I'll assemble them for you. <HungryLikeSkag>
No charge. This time. <HungryLikeSkag>
For the last time, Crank, I shipped those guns to your brother in the Fridge. Alright? <NoteForSelf>
I literally just told you -- <NoteForSelf>
(Sigh.) <NoteForSelf>
You want this AI thingy in a gun? Fine -- but just this once. <OOBE>
Hey, Vault Hunter! If you're gonna be a part of the Crimson Raiders, you'd better know how to use elemental weapons, don't you think? I've just got a crate of spanking-new Maliwan elemental weapons -- wanna help me test them out? <RockPaperGeno>
I'll see you in the firing range. Let's try out the fire weapon first, eh? <RockPaperGeno>
Now, get set at the patented Marcus Munitions Murdering range! Oh, and I'm just loaning you these weapons. Don't get too attached. <RockPaperGeno>
Fire weapons are extremely effective against flesh, but they're crap at destroying shields. <RockPaperGeno>
Hey -- I said you could BORROW that gun, not HAVE it! Frigging Vault Hunters. <RockPaperGeno>
Now, burn him like a skag steak! <RockPaperGeno>
I didn't give you a fire gun out of the kindness of my heart. BURN him, already. <RockPaperGeno>
Ahaha! Fire and flesh -- quite a nasty combination. <RockPaperGeno>
Now, how about a shielded target? <RockPaperGeno>
This Hyperion fascist thinks he's safe cause he's got a shield. Spoilers: he isn't. <RockPaperGeno>
Here, have a shock weapon! You'll need one to destroy this guy's shield. <RockPaperGeno>
No, no, no -- if you really want to break a shield, you'll need a shock weapon! <RockPaperGeno>
Take that, Jack-lover!! A few good hits from a shock weapon will zap a shield away quicker than you can say, "buyer's remorse!" <RockPaperGeno>
Now, what else -- ah! Armor! <RockPaperGeno>
Take this corrosive weapon -- you know what to do! <RockPaperGeno>
Armored targets, like these damned Hyperion robots, can take a lot of damage…unless you've got a corrosive weapon. <RockPaperGeno>
It'll take way too long to break through armor with bullets alone! Armor is resistant to most damage types. Use your corrosive weapon! <RockPaperGeno>
Next up -- explosive! Yes, that's an element. Don't question it. <RockPaperGeno>
Explosive guns do… okay damage to all enemy types, but they have a sizable blast radius. Try it out! <RockPaperGeno>
See? The damage wasn't amazing, but it's equally effective against shields, armor, or flesh. But really, who cares? Explosions! <RockPaperGeno>
See how the acid eats through the metal? I must confess -- I love corrosive weapons. <RockPaperGeno>
Now, let's try out these new slag guns! <RockPaperGeno>
Slag is a bit more complex. If you slag your enemy, all NON-slag damage will hurt even more! Here -- slag this chump. <RockPaperGeno>
No no no -- slag him first! <RockPaperGeno>
Now that he's slagged, he should be easy enough to finish off -- switch to another weapon and hit him again. <RockPaperGeno>
To do full damage, you'll want to switch to another weapon once your enemy has been slagged. <RockPaperGeno>
Great! A slagged enemy takes more damage from non-slag weapons. Now, let's talk about your payment. <RockPaperGeno>
Great! The weapons work, and you're ready to take on Handsome Jack. Now, let's talk about your payment. <RockPaperGeno>
If you want to purchase any elemental weapons like these, you could always buy some from your friendly neighborhood arms dealer. <RockPaperGeno>
No, no, no. Switch to another weapon and hit him again. <RockPaperGeno>
Jack blasted my personal safe out of my own store! My most precious treasure could be in the hands of some freeloading bandits by now! Head back to that city-sized hole in the ground and get my safe back!The player gets an objective: Retrieve Bank Vault. <SafeAndSound>
Son of a slag -- the safe must have tumbled into the caverns. I heard from Crazy Earl that some bandits are going after it -- get after them! <SafeAndSound>
You found the safe? Ohhh, thank god. Open it, and return its contents, quickly! <SafeAndSound>
Ahhhh. Gazongas. <SafeAndSound>
Curses! Those idiots dropped my safe into the Caustic Caverns. Get after it! <SafeAndSound>
I knew I hadn't heard the last of that gun. I bought it off a guy a few months ago. Great gun, but it's...cursed. I sold it to a bandit named Horace. <TheBane>
Dear [Roland,] I can’t help but notice the [Bloodshots] you are fighting pack some seeeeerious firepower. If you are going to have a chance against them, you’ll need to up your arsenal -- you could always arm your men with some high-quality munitions from my store. If you buy from me, those [Bloodshots] will be dead in no time! <MapEcho - Bloodshot>
Dear [Bloodshots,] I can’t help but notice the [Crimson Raiders] you are fighting pack some seeeeerious firepower. If you are going to have a chance against them, you’ll need to up your arsenal -- you could always arm your men with some high-quality munitions from my store. If you buy from me, those [Crimson Raiders] will be dead in no time! <MapEcho - Bloodshot>
Hey, Bloodshots! I notice you’re not buying any of my guns. Maybe you’re worried my wares aren’t deadly enough for you. With that in mind, please accept this complimentary crate of Marcus Munitions weaponry. If you like what you find, maybe we can make a deal! “Once you go Marcus Munitions, you’ll never go back...us munitions.” <MapEcho - Bloodshot>
Again with the thievering? <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
I should probably lock that. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
Dude. Not cool. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
Congrats -- you're the first person to have stolen from me and lived. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
We'll just call that a loan. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
You're paying me back for that later. Whether you like it or not. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
I've killed men for less. Well, ordered their deaths. Same thing. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
Yes, by all means. Rob my store in front of me. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
Hey. Come on. <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
Stop stealing from me! <Marcus - Interact - Steal - Money>
I'm not a price gouger -- you're just buying too many bullets! <Marcus - Interact - Welcome>
Supply and demand, bitches! <Marcus - Interact - Welcome>
If you've got a problem with my prices, blame the Eridium economy! <Marcus - Interact - Welcome>
The stronger you get, the more I'll charge! Deal with it! <Marcus - Interact - Welcome>
Finished that job yet? <Marcus - Quest - During>
How's that job going? I have quite a bit of money riding on you. <Marcus - Quest - During>
(fake jovially) I hope there's a good reason you haven't finished that job yet! <Marcus - Quest - During>
Get over here. I got work. <Marcus - Quest - New>
Hey. I got a job for you. <Marcus - Quest - New>
I've got an opportunity for you! <Marcus - Quest - New>
No jobs for you. Buzz off. <Marcus - Quest - No - New>
I got no work for you. Come back later. <Marcus - Quest - No - New>
I need nothing done right now. Try me later. <Marcus - Quest - No - New>
Jackpot! <Marcus - Quest - NPC - Mumble>
Time to take a load off. <Marcus - Quest - NPC - Mumble>
Ah, crap. <Marcus - Quest - NPC - Mumble>
Come on, work already! <Marcus - Quest - NPC - Mumble>
Hehe. <Marcus - Quest - NPC - Mumble>
Wanna make some money? I've got jobs for you back in Sanctuary. Get over here, chop chop! <Marcus - Quest - NPC - Reminder>
I knew I could count on you. <Marcus - Quest - Turn - In>
Ah. Always trust a mercenary. <Marcus - Quest - Turn - In>
You do good work, my friend. <Marcus - Quest - Turn - In>
Opportunity is knocking, friend! Will you answer, or blast a hole through the door? <Marcus - Quest - UI - Idle>
Moxxi hasn't mentioned me lately, has she? Eh, probably not. <Marcus - Quest - UI - Idle>
I miss my bus. <Marcus - Quest - UI - Idle>
Stay away from Crazy Earl's black market, friend. Never trust a man who won't accept cold, hard cash. <Marcus - Quest - UI - Idle>
Come back anytime! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Farewell, friend! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
I'm sure we'll be doing this again soon enough! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
tell your friends: Marcus munitions! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Remember, we're always open! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Good luck! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Don't have TOO much fun! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Don't die, I need your business! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Goodbye, friend! If you shop anywhere else I'll have you killed! <Marcus - Store - Bye>
Two words, my friend: no refunds. <Marcus - Store - Bye>
A pleasure as always! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Pleasure doing business! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Caveat emptor! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Lovely! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
May it help you kill many things! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
You're my millionth customer! Don't let it get to your head. <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Nothing like a good sale! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
May it keep you safe in your travels! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Thanks for the scratch! <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Nice to get back some of that money you stole from me. <Marcus - Store - Purchase>
Welcome to my humble shop! <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
Welcome, customer! <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
Let me know if anything catches your eye. <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
You won't find better merchandise anywhere else! I've made sure of that. <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
High quality, low prices, and no questions asked! <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
It's a fine day, full of opportunity! <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
A fantastic day for capitalism! <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
Feeling overburdened by money? <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
Let's just get this out of the way – yes, most of my merchandise was ripped from the hands of dead adventurers. <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
When you think “murder,” think “Marcus muntions!” <Marcus - Store - Welcome>
I've always got new stock -- check back later! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
I'll always buy guns you don't need! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Don't get killed! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
I'm always happy to take your money! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Your cash ain't worth a thing if you don't spend it! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Check back later to see my new Weapon of the Day! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
See you soon! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Always happy to do business with a Vault Hunter! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Tear the bad guys a new one, eh? <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Later, Vault Hunter! <Marcus - Vending - Bye>
Capitalism, baby! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
No refunds. <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
Tell your friends where you got that! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
A pleasure. <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
May it serve you well! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
Now, make some holes! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
That'll cause some pain! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
Bang! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
Enjoy your new instrument of death! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
Now get to killing! <Marcus - Vending - Purchase>
Bad luck -- no loot for you! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineBadLuck>
The donation was fine, but I was like, eh. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineBadLuck>
Didn't feel like giving you anything this time. Deal with it. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineBadLuck>
The wise Marcus does not smile upon you. You get nothing. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineBadLuck>
Sad trombone! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineBadLuck>
You know you gotta give me some gear, right? <Marcus - Vending - ShrineEmpty>
You didn't give me any gear? What's wrong with you? <Marcus - Vending - ShrineEmpty>
Do you not get how this works? Gimme some gear! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineEmpty>
You forgot to give me gear, dude. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineEmpty>
You gotta give me something to work with! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineEmpty>
Here you are! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGive>
The great Marcus bestows a gift unto you! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGive>
Take this gift from the great and powerful Marcus! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGive>
Here is a gift, loyal customer! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGive>
I made this thing for you. Take it already. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGive>
I think you'll be very happy with this. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGood>
I've made you some gear of considerable quality. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGood>
Not everybody receives loot this good. Be thankful. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGood>
This is better than the usual crap I give out. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGood>
This ain't the best I have to offer, but it's not the worst. <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGood>
Marcus smiles upon you! Consider yourself lucky! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGreat>
You deserve the best -- so here it is! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGreat>
Loot doesn't get ANY better than that! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGreat>
This is the best I have to offer! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGreat>
You have pleased me VERY much! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineGreat>
That ain't enough money. <Marcus - Vending - ShrinePoor>
The wise Marcus demands tribute! Get some more cash! <Marcus - Vending - ShrinePoor>
I'm running a religion here -- bring me some REAL money! <Marcus - Vending - ShrinePoor>
This ain't a charity! <Marcus - Vending - ShrinePoor>
The wise Marcus requires money. Go get some. <Marcus - Vending - ShrinePoor>
I can't do anything with those! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineWrong>
Thanks, but no thanks! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineWrong>
The great Marcus can't do a thing with that gear! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineWrong>
I got no recipes for that gear. Try something else! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineWrong>
That gear's no good to the great Marcus Kincaid! <Marcus - Vending - ShrineWrong>
You can always trust the gun at your side! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Why loot the dead when you can buy from me? <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Haven't found anything good? My weapon machines will fix that for ya! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Buy a gun, already! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Guns -- I've got them, you need them! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Guns, guns, guns! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Guns, glorious guns! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Lock and load! <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
You can never be too well-armed. <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>
Catch-a-gun! Guh. Never doing that again. <Marcus - Vending - Welcome>