The Post-Crumpocalyptic Sidequest in Borderlands 2
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"Post-Crumpocalyptic" is the side quest from Tiny Tina's Assault on Dragon Keep DLC in Borderlands 2. You are set of numerous sets of Crumpets that are scattered throughout the lands of Dragon keep.

Mission Type[edit]

Side Mission (DLC4) (Optional Mission)

Start location[edit]

Flamerock Refuge

How to start[edit]

Speak to Moxxi in Moxxi's Grog & Girls

Locations[edit]

Flamerock Refuge

The Forest

Docks of Little Importance

Mines of Avarice

Lair of Infinite Agony

Objectives[edit]

Collect crumpets in Flamerock Refuge 0/3

Collect crumpets in Docks of Little Importance 0/3

Collect crumpets in The Forest 0/3

Collect crumpets in Mines of Avarice 0/3

Collect crumpets in Lair of Infinite Agony 0/3

TURN IN: Ellie

Rewards[edit]

Money, XP

Mission Briefing[edit]

Never fight on an empty stomach.

Mission Debriefing[edit]

Hell hath no fury like an apathetic tree scorned.

Dialogue[edit]

Accept the quest:

Moxxi: "Times are tough sugar. Ever sinice the Sorcer cast his Crumpocalypse spell we've been runnin' alwful low on food. If you spot any crumpets, be a doll and grab 'em, wouldja?"

After collecting first set:

Mordecai: "What is a crumpet, anyway?"

Tina: "It is a criddle cake made from flour and yeast, traditionally eaten with butter. All I ever eat, son"

Mordecai: "Ever? Seriously? You should literally be dead."

Tina: (Mouth full) "Naw dog, I'm gonna live FOREVER."

Collect Second set of Crumpets:

Lilith: "Tina, you're thirteen years old. Maybe you should consider eating something other than crumpets. I brought food for lunch, you could --"

Tina: "OH GOD, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!"

Lilith: "What? It's a salad.

Tina: "WHY IS IT GREEN IT LOOKS LIKE THE DEVIL"

Lilith: "Just calm down --"

Tina: "It's staring at me."

Collect Third Set of Crumpets:

Lilith: "Tina, I need you to do me a favor and eat some salad."

Tina: "NnnnnNO, No, no, no!"

Lilith: "Mordy, hold her arms. Brick, keep her mouth open."

Tina: "No! YOU FOOD FASCISTS! You can't AARGHHFHFHFH--"

Mordecai: "Don't let her bite you too hard, Brick. She gets a taste for blood, we're gonna have problems."

After the set inside the Mines:

Tina: "I can't believe you made me eat salad."

Lilith: "it wasn't that bad, was it?"

Tina: "No, it wasn't. It was tasty. That's the PROBLEM!"

After collecting the Final Set of Crumpets:

Lilith: "Wait, you liked the salad? Why is that a problem?"

Tina: "You know who likes the taste of salads? ADULTS. I don't wanna be an adult!"

Lilith: "Tina, you're talking to three grown people who just collected a bunch of imaginary crumpets 'cause they thought it'd be fun. There's no such thing as adulthood."

Tina: "I -- you know what, girl? You make a good point. You get to live. For now. Turn the quest in to Ellie and I'll ya'll some XP."