www.egochaserenergybar.com is an ingame website in Grand Theft Auto V
Promotes the EgoChaser Energy Bars
It's all about you[edit]
PUMP YOURSELF UP
IT'S ALL ABOUT YOU.
You've run more triathlons and marathons than you can count. You train 60 hours a week and still kill it in middle management. Your house is full of gear - surfboards, hikin' poles, climbing gear, running shoes, belaying equipment, a wing-suit, and a carbon-fiber tri-bike that cost more than your car. You're an over-achiever, even though you weren't very good at real sports at school. Every piece of clothing you own breathes, wicks and clings so tight you look like a sausage. All you talk about is yourself and beating your personal best. You press it to the limit. You're who everyone wants to be. You don't have time for real friends or to eat proper meals. You don't need food. You need fuel. You need calories to bum, and the EgoChaser Energy Bar delivers.
Ingredients[edit]
Backed by literally weeks of top level research into sports nutrition, the EgoChaser is more than just a candy bar with some protein powder thrown in. It's perfectly evolved, just like you. All in perfect harmony with your needs.
EgoChaser Energy Bars nutritional information:
- 20,000 calories
- 300 grams of fat
- 212 grams of carbohydrates
- 152 grams of sugar
- 137 grams of protein
Performance Food[edit]
How do we fit so much in? There are many comple proteins in nature - often byproducts of molting, animal production or mating.
Curb your insatiable appetite for self-celebration and self-destruction with the EgoChaser Energy Bar.
It's time to take your food as seriously as you take yourself. EgoChaser gives you the extra boost you need to become the athlete you already think you are.
The question isn't whether you love yourself enough to spend $8.99 on a snack bar? High Performance demands a higher price. On your life. EgoChaser - It's the Energy Bar that's all about you. It's all about going all in. It's all about performance. It's exactly who you are, in a snack based format.
"THE EGOCHASER BAR HELPS ME THROW DOWN BITCHING WATTS WHEN I'M WORKING ON MY TRANSITIONS. IT’S A SICK CLEAN BURN AND GETS YOU RIGHT THERE."
Derrick Detantall
3 time winner EgoChaser Marathon.
Upcoming Triathlons[edit]
Ludicrously expensive, unfeasibly tedious tests of human endurance for Type A rich people! Training used to be preparation for sport.
EGOCHASER ENERGY GELS AND BLOCKS
Cachet in a sachet. A squirt of protein right to the back of the throat. With EgoChaser Energy Gels, you always finish strong.
Grind it, Pound it, Pulverize it. For hours.
Upcoming triathlons include:
